Holy crumb, it's Friday and we are halfway through MAY!
The sad news (not really bad, just disappointing) is that I still have not found a job. I have been grabbing hold of a couple of projects and getting paid and doing some equine massages (which is my true business and what I love!!)...so while there is not a 'steady' paycheck, things are slowly (ever so slowly) improving!
I finally received my new business cards! VISTA PRINT is amazing...the quality of their work is generally very good, the prices are amazing...often FREE and without them I could not be promoting my business.
Beginning to schedule equine massage clinics! Working up a criteria for a half day clinic and then the other half of the day working on horses at a very reduced rate. Am trying to make these clinics very affordable for the host and those who wish to have their horses worked on. I've also lowered my prices by about 20% to reflect the crappy economy.
So yes, the month is half gone, but I'm content...still smarting over having lost the crappy job I had, but seeing doors crack open and new beginnings!!!!
Friday, May 14, 2010
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Food Banks
For the moment let's understand that I am POOR...not by choice, but by circumstances. I certainly hope that by this time next year I will look back on this experience as one more area of growth in my life. What I do know is that by BEING POOR and not knowing where food or housing is coming from, that you are humbled. It doesn't matter if you are 3rd or 4th generation welfare person who knows how to 'work' the system, or a well educated/careered person like myself who just needs serious assistance for what hopefully is not much longer than a 'moment' in my life.
I applied for food stamps and because I have ZERO income qualified for them. It's the first time in my life I've gotten anything from the government. The nice woman who assisted me also gave me a list of resources to tap into...so I attempted to get assistance for my phone service but SPRINT does not BELONG to the plan to assist Oregonians!!! A huge conglomerate like SPRINT doesn't CARE ABOUT THE POOR...stuff that into my nifty little bag of 'what I'm finding out as a poor person'. Called ACCESS to get assistance with my power bill, which I get billed on the 15th of each month...but was told by the woman (who I couldn't understand well since her English flat SUCKED) that because they look at my income in MARCH for my APRIL bill, I don't qualify!! WOW...when I called them, I'd been unemployed for 3 weeks and had just received the bill...
So then we come to the title of this post "FOOD BANKS"...this is Red Cross, Salvation Army and any private/government group who gets food items donated and then you go through a check in and get a 'card' that you show each time and you get your FREE food. Doesn't this sound absolutely great!?!?!
I've been to three food banks. Much of the stuff is of course canned goods as you think they are 'non-perishable'...but one must CHECK the expiration dates on these non-perishables. I've thrown numerous items out because they have expired. Please don't tell me that this stuff still stays good for a 6 month period...preservatives break down and form all kinds of bad things that can make you ill and most probably could cause death in some instances.
The milk I received was dated 4/30, it is May 4th. Eggs were dated 5/1, it is May 4th. Cookies were dated October 1, 2009!!!!! Pre-packaged salad was dated April 28th.
Now I'm not knocking FREE food, but doesn't this begin to look like it comes with a price? If these food banks are giving out this much EXPIRED food, how many of these people are getting ill....especially the children?
Yes, the food banks are good, but SHAME on the companies donating it for allowing ANY that is EXPIRED to be given away....I'm sorry, we need help, but I don't want to get sick or potentially die.
I applied for food stamps and because I have ZERO income qualified for them. It's the first time in my life I've gotten anything from the government. The nice woman who assisted me also gave me a list of resources to tap into...so I attempted to get assistance for my phone service but SPRINT does not BELONG to the plan to assist Oregonians!!! A huge conglomerate like SPRINT doesn't CARE ABOUT THE POOR...stuff that into my nifty little bag of 'what I'm finding out as a poor person'. Called ACCESS to get assistance with my power bill, which I get billed on the 15th of each month...but was told by the woman (who I couldn't understand well since her English flat SUCKED) that because they look at my income in MARCH for my APRIL bill, I don't qualify!! WOW...when I called them, I'd been unemployed for 3 weeks and had just received the bill...
So then we come to the title of this post "FOOD BANKS"...this is Red Cross, Salvation Army and any private/government group who gets food items donated and then you go through a check in and get a 'card' that you show each time and you get your FREE food. Doesn't this sound absolutely great!?!?!
I've been to three food banks. Much of the stuff is of course canned goods as you think they are 'non-perishable'...but one must CHECK the expiration dates on these non-perishables. I've thrown numerous items out because they have expired. Please don't tell me that this stuff still stays good for a 6 month period...preservatives break down and form all kinds of bad things that can make you ill and most probably could cause death in some instances.
The milk I received was dated 4/30, it is May 4th. Eggs were dated 5/1, it is May 4th. Cookies were dated October 1, 2009!!!!! Pre-packaged salad was dated April 28th.
Now I'm not knocking FREE food, but doesn't this begin to look like it comes with a price? If these food banks are giving out this much EXPIRED food, how many of these people are getting ill....especially the children?
Yes, the food banks are good, but SHAME on the companies donating it for allowing ANY that is EXPIRED to be given away....I'm sorry, we need help, but I don't want to get sick or potentially die.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
On Being SICK
Wow, I've not written anything in a couple of days because I am actually ill...like don't want to get out of bed and face anything about the world ill.
It's very strange for me to pick up a bug of sorts, I am certain this is the first time in probably 20 years, so I'm PISSED.
I have ALOT to do...mainly find work of some sort NOW and this stupid bug that is invading me is not helping matters.
When you are unemployed and so broke that you truly cannot buy ANYTHING, being ill is not cool. Some people would say to me "it's your body telling you to rest"...rubbish I say. If I am this stressed and now SICK, how can one REST?
A million things are running through my head and have been since Saturday when getting out of bed proved impossible...get a job, any job will do for the most part at this moment in time, get with those that want to have you do a clinic and start brainstorming and scheduling these, then I need to do follow ups at places I've already applied at...none of this goes away when you are ill and can't get out of bed for longer then about 20 minutes without thinking you will keel over.
Of course I don't get some of these places hiring and I wonder how legal some of the antics are that they pull to see who REALLY wants a job! You'd think they would be intelligent enough to know that if someone takes the time to fill out an application and whatever else is required...that person no doubt wants/needs the job!
You know that keel over period? It arrived...back to bed, more later.
It's very strange for me to pick up a bug of sorts, I am certain this is the first time in probably 20 years, so I'm PISSED.
I have ALOT to do...mainly find work of some sort NOW and this stupid bug that is invading me is not helping matters.
When you are unemployed and so broke that you truly cannot buy ANYTHING, being ill is not cool. Some people would say to me "it's your body telling you to rest"...rubbish I say. If I am this stressed and now SICK, how can one REST?
A million things are running through my head and have been since Saturday when getting out of bed proved impossible...get a job, any job will do for the most part at this moment in time, get with those that want to have you do a clinic and start brainstorming and scheduling these, then I need to do follow ups at places I've already applied at...none of this goes away when you are ill and can't get out of bed for longer then about 20 minutes without thinking you will keel over.
Of course I don't get some of these places hiring and I wonder how legal some of the antics are that they pull to see who REALLY wants a job! You'd think they would be intelligent enough to know that if someone takes the time to fill out an application and whatever else is required...that person no doubt wants/needs the job!
You know that keel over period? It arrived...back to bed, more later.
Job Hunting is EXHAUSTING
Being unemployed, broke, but with ambition and a dream is TOUGH....
First, you need to continually be LOOKING for a job, in this crappy economy, ANY job will do thank you very much...well, one that is LEGAL (although the illegal ones would be oh so much more profitable!). Then me, being me, has this head full of ideas as to my dreams and goals, so all this head noise sometimes exhausts me to the point I can't move forward, even with a baby space....thus was today.
I woke up exhausted and I never quite got going...I did the obligatory running to places I've applied to 'check in' (at this point either interview or tell me to go away please!), have called or shown my face at potential places, sent resumes via the internet and at some point we all need something warm and fuzzy thrown our way to make all this work seem like it's been worth it! I am NOT talking about warm and fuzzy road kill here either.
Unemployment sucks, I want to be productive and get PAID for it thank you...
Yep not working for pay is horrible...what people who are not unemployed don't realize that trying to FIND WORK is a full-time NON-paying JOB in itself and often lasts months or even years....
First, you need to continually be LOOKING for a job, in this crappy economy, ANY job will do thank you very much...well, one that is LEGAL (although the illegal ones would be oh so much more profitable!). Then me, being me, has this head full of ideas as to my dreams and goals, so all this head noise sometimes exhausts me to the point I can't move forward, even with a baby space....thus was today.
I woke up exhausted and I never quite got going...I did the obligatory running to places I've applied to 'check in' (at this point either interview or tell me to go away please!), have called or shown my face at potential places, sent resumes via the internet and at some point we all need something warm and fuzzy thrown our way to make all this work seem like it's been worth it! I am NOT talking about warm and fuzzy road kill here either.
Unemployment sucks, I want to be productive and get PAID for it thank you...
Yep not working for pay is horrible...what people who are not unemployed don't realize that trying to FIND WORK is a full-time NON-paying JOB in itself and often lasts months or even years....
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Rain!
Funny thing about rain when you've lived in a desert and southern California much of your adult life...you suddenly move to a rainy place and it's fascinating, but suddenly it becomes 'old'! We are on day two of rain, with another day left to go and I'm over it!...but a part of me, perhaps the 'little girl' in me is loving it!
I began this blog with a very capsuled introduction and then mentioned moving BACK to California (I generally move back to either California or Arizona it seems!) only to be put on a hit list by the EVIL ONE!
Having lost that contract was like having all the air sucked out of you and then a semi running over you, it was absolutely horrible...but then I'm a survivor and someone who moves forward quickly. Of course I just figured when one contract ends, another will begin quickly enough, so I breathed deep and worked to make THAT happen...it didn't, not for a month and as each month dragged on it became a year...
Yep, I applied for anything that was legal...waitressing, bartending, working in the fields, temporary. I was too qualified (yes, I even 'dummy downed' my resume), too old, a woman, etc. Those of you in California that have gone through this, or are going through this can feel my pain and anxiety.
So the next thing I did was re-activate my real estate license and move forward in that arena...talk about unethical and corrupt! This industry went from one extreme, got their hands slapped and then learned new ways to do the same thing they got 'slapped' for, only to do it better figuring they wouldn't get caught! I sold three properties, worked with each buyer a long time, worked HARD...100s of hours each. Then things fell to hell, bad client, lender who was corrupt and hiding things and whom I REFUSED to bail out...all of this cost my reputation and most of my commission being stolen by my Broker.
Now I am feeling a tad postal....can't get legal work, put 100s of hours and all my eggs into that real estate market, only to have a large percentage of commission due me taken (yep, Broker went to Alaska, China and various other trips...hope he had a great time!) and it was like I couldn't breath.
Oh, guess I didn't mention that I do have a B.A. in Business Management. I have a certificate from the University of California as a Paralegal.
So the saga continues.....
I began this blog with a very capsuled introduction and then mentioned moving BACK to California (I generally move back to either California or Arizona it seems!) only to be put on a hit list by the EVIL ONE!
Having lost that contract was like having all the air sucked out of you and then a semi running over you, it was absolutely horrible...but then I'm a survivor and someone who moves forward quickly. Of course I just figured when one contract ends, another will begin quickly enough, so I breathed deep and worked to make THAT happen...it didn't, not for a month and as each month dragged on it became a year...
Yep, I applied for anything that was legal...waitressing, bartending, working in the fields, temporary. I was too qualified (yes, I even 'dummy downed' my resume), too old, a woman, etc. Those of you in California that have gone through this, or are going through this can feel my pain and anxiety.
So the next thing I did was re-activate my real estate license and move forward in that arena...talk about unethical and corrupt! This industry went from one extreme, got their hands slapped and then learned new ways to do the same thing they got 'slapped' for, only to do it better figuring they wouldn't get caught! I sold three properties, worked with each buyer a long time, worked HARD...100s of hours each. Then things fell to hell, bad client, lender who was corrupt and hiding things and whom I REFUSED to bail out...all of this cost my reputation and most of my commission being stolen by my Broker.
Now I am feeling a tad postal....can't get legal work, put 100s of hours and all my eggs into that real estate market, only to have a large percentage of commission due me taken (yep, Broker went to Alaska, China and various other trips...hope he had a great time!) and it was like I couldn't breath.
Oh, guess I didn't mention that I do have a B.A. in Business Management. I have a certificate from the University of California as a Paralegal.
So the saga continues.....
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Introduction continued!
So when I headed back to California from the midwest, I was excited...I LOVE California and this was exciting! A job, (save it to say that I was a 1099 contractor) with a client that I had enjoyed immensely in the past! I return the month before Christmas of '08...got to the office, met with the administrator and attorneys and dug in...but then HELL happened!
A 'new' person since I had last done work for them...this was an EVIL 'new' person...EVIL TO THE CORE. Yet she had a hold of sorts over the law office, or more specifically the two partners and to this date I do not know what it was, but it was strong and she ran roughshod over the other employees and would keep the young gals in TEARS and they actually HATED her, not disliked her, they flat HATED HER.
Yes, I knew this was going to be a tough call for me. My thought was to work hard, let things roll of my back and in 3 months the regular paralegal would be back and I'd be based out of my home...money was too good NOT to go with that plan.
So EVIL ONE and I worked literally 6 feet from each other...I swear she was deaf and everything had to be LOUD...ringer on the phone, ringer on her cell phone announcing her over 100 texts a day from her live-in, radio (with crap music), her voice when she spoke or talked on the phone...UGH. I breathed, I practiced simple meditation....because it was only 3 months in the office!
EVIL ONE had other plans, she was not going to rest until I was in tears...well I don't cry at evil people easily, but I DO speak my mind. I believe the day she called me stupid, petty and worthless was about the day that I came a tad unhinged.
This abuse (with the partners and administrator knowing) lasted a month...on New Year's Eve day I was told that they had 'hired' someone and that was that....so started my downward spiral in this economy and the world of unemployment!
NOTE: as a 1099 contractor you cannot collect unemployment benefits
A 'new' person since I had last done work for them...this was an EVIL 'new' person...EVIL TO THE CORE. Yet she had a hold of sorts over the law office, or more specifically the two partners and to this date I do not know what it was, but it was strong and she ran roughshod over the other employees and would keep the young gals in TEARS and they actually HATED her, not disliked her, they flat HATED HER.
Yes, I knew this was going to be a tough call for me. My thought was to work hard, let things roll of my back and in 3 months the regular paralegal would be back and I'd be based out of my home...money was too good NOT to go with that plan.
So EVIL ONE and I worked literally 6 feet from each other...I swear she was deaf and everything had to be LOUD...ringer on the phone, ringer on her cell phone announcing her over 100 texts a day from her live-in, radio (with crap music), her voice when she spoke or talked on the phone...UGH. I breathed, I practiced simple meditation....because it was only 3 months in the office!
EVIL ONE had other plans, she was not going to rest until I was in tears...well I don't cry at evil people easily, but I DO speak my mind. I believe the day she called me stupid, petty and worthless was about the day that I came a tad unhinged.
This abuse (with the partners and administrator knowing) lasted a month...on New Year's Eve day I was told that they had 'hired' someone and that was that....so started my downward spiral in this economy and the world of unemployment!
NOTE: as a 1099 contractor you cannot collect unemployment benefits
An Introduction
Let's get to know each other, actually I'll share something about myself with you. I think it's important as you follow this blog. Judge me, don't judge me, love me, hate me, cheer me on, boo me....none of it matters. This is my journey and my diary about struggling in America today...unemployed and wondering what will happen next.
Okay, so about me....I'm over 50, single white female. Grew up in Wisconsin, moved to the Southwest not much out of high school and spent most of my time between Arizona and California. My folks did the best they could. Dad was a pharmacist, Mom stayed at home until we got somewhat older....while my folks had probably alot of the same problems and dealt with many of the same issues we all do now, they did WELL by us for the most part. Mom was great...she is now 82 and my best friend and one of the most amazing and intelligent women I know.
Dad....well Dad was tough, he didn't really show his love, he put us down alot...we never knew how to take Dad. As I look back as an adult, I see that Dad did what he thought was right...even though it often wasn't. He was a proud man, highly educated, decorated WWII vet...there were three of us kids. Myself, my older sister (Betti) and my brother (John). My sister Betti passed away 3 1/2 years ago and I've never quite gotten over it...Betti and I lived far apart all our adult life and I don't spend one day now not regretting this. She was a beautiful soul, intelligent to a fault...not only IQ wise, but street/common sense wise. I will write more about her later, just because I know I must. My brother John has little to do with what is left of our family...he is extremely successful from a financial viewpoint, highly (IQ) intelligent, but I wonder sometimes how he can like himself.
As we all do, I've made mistakes through life...learned from them for the most part. I often now wish for a period of ten years that I seem to have lost in my life because of some of these mistakes and poor choices.
I moved to southern Oregon a few months back...had no money left in savings after being unemployed in southern California for a year. Let's back up, I had left California in '08 and gone to the midwest, had a job that was sort of unstable and not quite full-time, but didn't much mind and the living was cheaper...then the allure of an old client in San Diego ENTICING me with words such as; "we need to you to fill in for 4 months for a maternity leave" and "after that we have trials throughout '09 & '10 and you can do all our trial prep" and then "don't worry, you'll have job security"...made me pack up, use the rest of the money I'd saved and move on back to California! Can you say OUCH?!?!?!
.....more later.
Okay, so about me....I'm over 50, single white female. Grew up in Wisconsin, moved to the Southwest not much out of high school and spent most of my time between Arizona and California. My folks did the best they could. Dad was a pharmacist, Mom stayed at home until we got somewhat older....while my folks had probably alot of the same problems and dealt with many of the same issues we all do now, they did WELL by us for the most part. Mom was great...she is now 82 and my best friend and one of the most amazing and intelligent women I know.
Dad....well Dad was tough, he didn't really show his love, he put us down alot...we never knew how to take Dad. As I look back as an adult, I see that Dad did what he thought was right...even though it often wasn't. He was a proud man, highly educated, decorated WWII vet...there were three of us kids. Myself, my older sister (Betti) and my brother (John). My sister Betti passed away 3 1/2 years ago and I've never quite gotten over it...Betti and I lived far apart all our adult life and I don't spend one day now not regretting this. She was a beautiful soul, intelligent to a fault...not only IQ wise, but street/common sense wise. I will write more about her later, just because I know I must. My brother John has little to do with what is left of our family...he is extremely successful from a financial viewpoint, highly (IQ) intelligent, but I wonder sometimes how he can like himself.
As we all do, I've made mistakes through life...learned from them for the most part. I often now wish for a period of ten years that I seem to have lost in my life because of some of these mistakes and poor choices.
I moved to southern Oregon a few months back...had no money left in savings after being unemployed in southern California for a year. Let's back up, I had left California in '08 and gone to the midwest, had a job that was sort of unstable and not quite full-time, but didn't much mind and the living was cheaper...then the allure of an old client in San Diego ENTICING me with words such as; "we need to you to fill in for 4 months for a maternity leave" and "after that we have trials throughout '09 & '10 and you can do all our trial prep" and then "don't worry, you'll have job security"...made me pack up, use the rest of the money I'd saved and move on back to California! Can you say OUCH?!?!?!
.....more later.
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